So my parents are off to Virginia/Tennessee/Kentucky area this week to scout out potential retirement areas. It made me realise that I will eventually have to make a decision about everything I'm storing at their house- furniture, my mattress, kitchenware, loads of books and plays, a couple of boxes of family photos from my Nana (some from the late 1800's even)... I mean, I want all that stuff, but if I have it shipped to England... What happens if for whatever reason, I *don't* make it to the point where I can apply for "indefinite leave to remain" status and then dual citizenship? If I get fired or otherwise leave my employer, I have to leave the country. It would suck spending a couple thousand dollars to get everything over here, only to have to move it back again. I have time, though, because I don't think my parents will be moving for another four or five years. By then, I should have a really good idea of what's going on.

On the plus side (yes, in my miserable, depressive, I-hate-when-the-season-changes-to-autumn, I have screwed up with old and dear friends yet again state, I can find a bright side), I learned that my younger brother has found a new job. And not just a random, I-need-money job. It's in the IT department of a major bank. It sounds like a real grown up job, like, where you could save money, buy a car, maybe even think about a nice apartment or a house eventually. And he's still with his girlfriend who he's been with for (3? 4?) years now. Hmm... Aside from wondering if he'll pop the question someday, hearing about this job kind of took a weight off my shoulders. For the first time, I felt like I might not have to be the one in charge when my parents become *really* old and we have to worry about care, and decisions and things. I might just have one fewer thing to worry about...

I was thinking about my trip back to America for the Christmas holiday this year. I will have missed the 10 year high school reunion that will have occurred over Thanksgiving, and I'm not sure if I'm happy about that or not. It would be really depressing because of the number of marriages, and the kids that go along with that. At the same time, how many people can say they have as cool a job as I have, and that they've gotten to travel? In the end, that's small potatoes. I'm more concerned about getting together with my extended family (I hope we *can* get together). While I will like being the attention, I am *still* conscious of being singled out as being special, a high achiever, like I was when I was little. I mean, I have a cousin who's a lawyer, and it was nice for a while because the focus was deflected off of me. But I don't want to take up the conversation. I mean, I'll have babies to meet for the first time, husbands/boyfriends of cousins to become reacquainted with, gossip to catch up on... totally possible I'm thinking too highly of myself, though. Maybe nobody really will care :-P (somehow, knowing the places I've been, and they will never travel to... they will want stories). But it's something that lurks in the back of my head, the kinda "prodigal daughter/family member" returns home. I'm not that special. This is just me, in pursuit of my life.